Finding the celebration after a painful surgery

This past week, two of my closest friends were in the hospital for surgery one day apart.

During big life moments like this, I’m really good at remaining my positive, cheery, optimistic self.  If there are any slight moments of fear, they are quick lived – I feel them, then I let them go. There is no place for fear when our bodies are about to go through a major transformation on the operating table.

But Friday was a little different.

Painful Memories

As I walked into the hospital early Friday morning, to be with one of my friends, memories flooded my mind.

I smelt the familiar sterile whiff of hospital cleaning products.
I shivered at the ice-cold temperature that lingered in the waiting room air.
I remembered waiting in the exact pre-surgery chairs, and laying in the same pre-op bed.

You see, I had a major transformation 4 years ago in that same hospital.

I had a rib removed.

I know! Weird, right? I still get “Give Adam back his rib” jokes to this day.

This rib I had removed was an extra rib that apparently I was born with, sitting just below my right clavicle bone. It would have been fine living there for the rest of my life, but it was pressing down on a major artery that drains blood into my right arm, so yeah, we got that thing out.

The Blessing Behind the Pain

The amazing thing about this story is that I never would have known the rib was there, had it not been for my boyfriend at the time, who just happened to be a doctor.

I’m so clear that he was brought into my life for that specific purpose – to be with me through all the puzzled looks from doctors who couldn’t figure out what this lump in my neck was, canceled appointments, re-evaluations, re-diagnosis, and of course, post-surgery which landed me in the ICU for a night, then a main hospital room for 2 more days, healing my fragile ribs. Phew, it’s exhausting just recounting everything that ensured over that year and a half long period leading up to the surgery.

A 4 Year Transformation

While my memories trickled in, on Friday morning, allowing me to ponder my life pre-surgery, a surge of awareness washed over me.

I was present to the pain my physical body had experience, but I also had this inner peace. Almost like a knowingness that that surgery was a necessary step in my transformational journey.

Not only had my physical body been transformed with the removal of my extra rib, but I had experienced the majority of my major emotional and spiritual growth spurt over the past 4 years as well!

My Vulnerable Post-Surgery Picture

So today, I’m baring it all.  Showing you one of my most vulnerable places that few have seen: my arm pit, where my surgery scar is.

This area is really scary for me to show you, not really because of my scar, but because I’ve always hated my armpits.  I wasn’t blessed with skin that cleanly shaves. Sometimes I feel like God played a cosmic joke on me, knowing that I’d be a leader in women’s empowerment, so he put a 5 o’clock shadow under my armpit, just to remind me of the masculine.

But, aside from my insecurities about my armpits, and in full Self Love celebration, here is my unedited, raw & real photo…

transformational pain of surgery

Maybe you are in pain, whether physical or emotional. Maybe you are feeling tender and exposed.  Just remember this:

Through each painful experience is an opportunity to surrender.  Feel the pain.  Know you are supported.

Celebrate the transformational pain of your surgery.  You have new wings. (CLICK TO TWEET)

What pain are you celebrating? Share with all the Legit Lovers below…

I would love to hear from you in the comments below. Just log in to Facebook for the comment function to work.  Easy breezy! As always, thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts :)

Legit Loving you and all your painful scars,
Jess

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