I am grateful for my heartbreaks (you can be too)


It’s not a word that usually comes to mind when we are recently heartbroken.

It took me a really, really long time to be able to say: “I’m so grateful for my heartbreaks.” In fact, what came out of my mouth used to be something like: “F this. Men are jerks. I’m never loving again. Heart. CLOSED.”

But today, I can say with all honesty that I’m SO grateful for ALL of my heartbreaks. 

For the personal-development junkie who moved to a different state, then broke up with me while flinging curse words at me over the phone. Thank you for opening my eyes to spirituality and leading me to my soul community in Las Vegas.

For the doctor who didn’t show up for Christmas, leaving me embarrassed and ashamed, and spiraling into depression. Thank you for coming into my life before I discovered I needed surgery to remove my extra rib. I don’t know how I would have navigated the medical system without you. And thank you for helping me realize that a “nice” life sitting around watching Duke basketball is not the life for me.

For the erotic fiction writer, who met someone at my event and didn’t tell me until 6 months later. Thank you for bringing me to my power, introducing me to meditation, being my partner in business and adventure and risk. And for the long endless conversations that were so meaningful.

For the engineer, who broke up with me a week after I quit my corporate job. Thank you for showing me what it’s like for someone to be 100% in for me, and 100% out. I felt so adored and loved by you. I now know what this feels like.


It can be hard to get to this place of gratefulness. So if you’re not there, I understand. However, here’s what’s really important:

Acknowledge why your heartbreak hurts…but also focus on the gifts. Both are important.

This is what will get you through and allow your heart to remain open to a deeper, more meaningful love without closing off and getting stuck in the pain.

Here’s a great question to ask yourself to begin the path towards gratitude for your previous relationships, heartbreaks and exes:

Why did this happen for me?

(instead of TO me, which is usually our default)

Now it’s your turn…

I’d love to hear your answer to this question in the comments below! 🙂
What is 1 reason why your heartbreak happened FOR you?

Here’s to gratitude for our heartbreaks. And thankfulness for our strong hearts that keep on beating and loving…more deeply each day.

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you in the U.S. I love you and I’m so grateful you are part of this community of women dedicated to healing their hearts!

To Your Radiance,

jess e-sig


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