I hate feeling rushed.
The irony around this is that I am REALLY good at working under pressure.
I thrive at it.
Enjoy the rush.
The pressure to get SHIT done!
And yet, when it comes to something that I’m not ready to be rushed at, the rules change.
I get pissed.
I roll my eyes.
I feel anxious.
Why don’t they get it?
I’m taking my time here.
Making calculated moves.
Savoring the moment.
But I don’t want to get in the way of others.
Talk about a polarity within myself.
I really started understanding this side of me while I was in Peru.
While climbing Huayna Picchu, the very large, steep mountain behind Machu Picchu, focus was required. I tried not to listen too much to my friends who told me to be careful, prior to my trip, warning me that people have fallen off the mountain and died. Hello, talk about infusing some fear into this naturally optimistic gal!
Nevertheless, as I sized up the large mountain, in all her grandeur, it was clearly apparent – safety was going to be key.
For me, climbing up wasn’t so bad. I naturally lean my body forward, so I’ve always been confident that if I fall, it’s going to be forward. When going up, no worries, this means I could land on my hands if necessary.
But then, after our hour plus hike up the glorious green piece of Pachamama, came the trek down.
Suddenly, the tiny little steps we climbed up were looking even smaller from up top as I grasped the wall, careful of each and every step.
In this moment, with people behind me, moving MUCH more quickly that I, there was a huge lesson for me:
Jess, all you have to worry about is yourself. Take your time. Who cares if they are in a rush. They can take care of themselves. You don’t have to move for anyone. Do what feels safe and good for YOU.
In that moment, as I spoke these words gently to myself, I took a deep breath in, feeling my body relax.
The rest of the climb down was just as terrifying, but what gave me peace was the protection I created for myself.
So many times, especially as women, we assume responsibility for others. I’ve been guilty of this for most of my life.
Oh, are you in line? Pardon me, and step in front of me.
(nudging my friend) Watch out, someone is behind us trying to get by.
(in the car) Speed up or move over Jess, this person is trying to get by.
Letting go of feeling responsible for others is so important, it is one of the top reasons I created the Legit Love Revolution.
It’s vital to our survival, people. It’s been crucial to my own transformation.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care, shouldn’t empathize or want to help. It just means that you put yourself first. Your needs, your boundaries. Taking care of numero uno before you lend a helping hand. Slowly trotting down the tiny steps at Huayna Picchu and releasing any urgent feeling in your body to stop, move aside or speed up just to accommodate someone else.
This is your journey in life. Create your own rules. Then, even more importantly, play by them. And if that means taking your sweet ass time going down some ridiculously slender and steep steps, by gosh, do it.
Do you ever feel pressure to speed up when you want to go slow? How does this make you feel?
I’d love to hear from you in the comments section below…just login to Facebook so the comment box shows up, then leave your thoughts. Easy breezy! Let’s start a conversation!
Legit Loving you,
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