The 2 magic questions that create instant connection – in business and relationships

Success and Spirituality are sexy.

This is the topic I’m enthusiastic about lately – first and foremost because I know the impact it made in my own corporate success.  The more and more I began to show my true colors, show up as 100% authentically ME, the easier it was to connect with others (even if I was terrified of what they would think of me) and…the more I was promoted or received a pay increase (3 times in 2 years!) Find out more about this on my upcoming webinar.

I want the same for you.  For you to be so comfortable being EXACTLY who you are that the only thing that might look different about your business side and spiritual side is you’re wearing a pencil skirt one moment and yoga pants the next 😉

Radiant Self Care is bringing together these sides – giving yourself permission to show up, in all aspects and roles, as your true self…and be damn proud about it!

So, to support you in beginning to feel super comfortable bringing ALL parts of you together, I’d like to share a few questions that are seriously MAGICAL. They allow you to be who you are, as well as creating a deep connection with those around you.

The first one I learned at a conference from a gal who works for Lululemon. She uses it at the beginning of every meeting they have in their workplace.  I took the same question and began using it at corporate with my own team for a few years, and I even use it in my relationships! It creates INSTANT connection and I’ve noticed it gives everyone permission to be who they are while being totally accepted.

all sides of you_quote

The 2 magic questions that create instant connection – in business and relationships:

1. What do you need to clear? Or…Is there anything you’d like to get off your chest?

This question – a “clearing” – provides people the opportunity to let go of something that may be bothering them, so that the meeting or conversation can move forward with a clean slate. Many times, we jump into connection with others – whether it is a work meeting or a conversation with a partner/friend – without ACTUALLY allowing them to share if anything is bothering them.  This is SO powerful.  All you have to do is listen.  Or let them know that you are sorry for whatever they are going through (if appropriate). That’s it.

When I used this in a work setting with my team the results were crazy! We started to feel more connected, sharing things we might not normally share, and therefore, really getting to know the person behind the “worker.” When people see a glimpse of you and your life, we bond at the human level (which also means we’ll go to greater lengths supporting each other in business). This strengthens relationships of all kinds – business and personal. 


Did you enjoy the first question? If yes, I’d love to invite you to join this conversation of “How to bring all of you together for exponential impact” – check out the webinar & sign-up here!


The second question is something to lighten the air. To bring us back to noticing what is “right” since oftentimes the first question – a clearing – can tend to be a bit heavy. This second question also creates connection because it allows us each to shine our Radiant Lights, acknowledging the accomplishments of each other. We don’t do this enough.

2. What are you celebrating?

When I used these questions in the work setting, I gave my team permission to answer either of these questions with a business or personal answer.  What we need to clear or what we want to celebrate are not always going to be related to work.  Nor are they always related to personal.  They can be either.  You might want to clear that your mom just had surgery and you are worried about her, or you might want to confess that a particular work project has you frustrated beyond all belief.  Likewise, you might be celebrating completing a huge, challenging work project, or you might celebrate that you took some self care time and actually rested the night before.

The important thing is that these questions provide an outlet to shine a little bit of you.

My hope is that you implement them at work (whether you are a leader of a team or not, bring them up and see what happens!), with your romantic partner, or even in a circle of girlfriends when you get together for wine dates.  I promise – the results will bring instant connection whether you are at work or in business!

What are you clearing and/or celebrating?

I’d love to hear from you in the comments below 🙂

To Your Radiance,

jess e-sig


If you’d like to learn more about Finding Your Sexy in Success and Spirituality, you’re going to love an upcoming webinar that I’m doing! Find our more: CLICK HERE.


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